Hey! Ask me your text game questions, and post up your convos.. I'm HERE TO HELP!

Had drinks with this girl last tuesday. She had to get back to study so didn't pull her back. Made out with her in my car, probably should have pushed for some more shit. Texted her the next day.

me: Had fun last night. Hows you're day been? 

her: Yah it was fun. Day is crazy

me: Yah fashion week must be nuts! What's your last name, gonna add u

her: Its insane. (last name)

me: It's actually getting so cold! We should ditch Canada (texted this the next day)

her: Ugh I know I wore like 12 layers today.

me: haha you sure that wasn't just part of your outfit for the day? 

no response

me: It's fine, I don't like your haircut anyway

her: icon of haircut

me: It's my last wkn in canada, waht are you getting up to tn

her: Where are you going? And I"m not gonna be in the city :(

me: I"m going to LA on Friday till end of November

her: you lucky bastard

me: haha but just think how miserable I'm going to be when I have to come back

her: Yah it might even be snowing ;)

me: Let's get some icrecream and watch at movie at my place. What works better, tm or wednesday 

her: I thought you were leaving the country?

me: I am but not till Friday

hmm. I think that was just too logical and kinda boring 

her: Ugh I know I wore like 12 layers today.

me: haha you sure that wasn't just part of your outfit for the day?

I think she didn't respond to this because it doesn't really make sense. 

her: Where are you going? And I"m not gonna be in the city :( Do you only see her when she's in the city?  If so, is it possible to meet up with her when she's not in the city?

Tell her  Ice cream is melting.. if you want to lick the cone before it drips all over better hurry or I'm going to eat it!!
 

I was actually insinuating that she's wearing 12 layers to be fashionable, not from the cold. I can see how it didn't really make sense though. 

I've only ever gone out with her once. She lives in the city for school but I think she is from a smaller town about 40 minutes away. So I think she went back to her hometown on that weekend. I just sent her that text that you came up with, sounds pretty solid. We'll see. Don't really care if it goes cold cuz plenty of more girls where she came from. 

Sounds like I have to be a bit more creative and funny/challenging with my texting. I kept it pretty simple 

me: Icecream is melting.. If you want to lick the cone before it drips all over better hurry or I'm going to eat it

her: haha awe, I'm working tonight (5 mins later)

Thinking about this:

me: Where do you work, I'm going to come kidnap you 

Ive got a couple not sure where to go from here

girl #1 

I dont have the rest of the convo but this is what I have

me: my sisters watching cartoons it reminded me of you

girl: lmao whyy

me: idk and ay this child isnt gunna support itself (ive been using that manwhore im pregnant with your kid thing)

girl: wat chu mean I have the kid come pick it up

me: come drop it off 

girl: lmao

me: put it in your backpack bring it to me tomorrow 

girl: lmfao 

me: put a piece of lettuce so it wont starve, wassup kickit

her:lmao shut up wyd

me: delivering something (i was)

her: gay

me: ur mom

her: fuck u

me: im jk night fag

her: night fag

(next day)

me: ay

No reply, I see where I fucked up I should of hopped on it when she said "come pick it up"  which led to all this bullshit. Help me out here pals. backstory: she approached me but she acts stuuupid she never texts me first, but she tells me to text her when I see her..shes got a boyfriend now but I dont see that as a problem honestly

girl #2

her: u no u liked that cacca hug

me: not as much as you did

her: whatever! X)

me: its true, wyd?

her: ahaha watever :p  taking my dog a shower (: u? :* (Right here I was like wtf? she acts different in person)

me: hop in there with him your filthy, you didnt go to x period?

her: I know my mom took me out earlyyy (:

me: wyd tonight its fried day

her: i might go to the game idk yettt :p u? (:

me: come waste your 7 dollars with me better

(no reply)

(2 weeks later)

me: hey is sam there

her: heyy duddee ! (:

me: whats up wyd, im selling hats

her: going homeeee u? u sell? X)

me: no way me too , it depends what you mean by sell (this text was super weak so i could understand)

no reply

This girl is pretty weird. She looks at me and stuff during school ill be catching her. She acts dumb when I talk to her, its like just when she wants to be flirty and shit. But when I text her its like its a whole different person..Where should I go from here? Make fun of me please so i could feel bad and want to improve

Tell her:

well now i have to kidnap you after work, come over and do laundry because I got ice cream on my pants...it's all your fault woman!

Crim

It would be nice to get some more context from you about this.  But from what I see here I think you're being kinda boring.  Not giving her anything to go off.  Invite her somewhere don't just ask her what she's doing, create something for the both of you to do.

"Not sure why you guys don't post more convos! I'm here to help you text your girls! Let's go!!

Rogan's around as well, another text game master ;)

And Social Fembot is back!! She's better than both of us lol"

Really? O wordddd

Damn, that's gold..... Wish I saw this earlier. Nonetheless I appreciate the ideas, will store it for future use 

Crimson that first convo was hilarious. Yeah as Fembot says you need to craft some kind of shared experience and accuse her of being too gay/bratty/too much of a pumpkinbutt to attend. 

Haha your last sentence.. ok the only real critique right here is as Fembot is saying. Your texting is pretty funny, you've obviously got MASSIVE rapport with these girls.. you need to start "crafting" meetups and improving this area of your game in general. 

To Fembot and Manwhore;

Thanks for the advice ill definately use it and I appreciate the time :) 

However can I get an example of how you usually ask for meetups?  I usually just say "lets kickit"..or ill say something like "lets blaze"..texting has always been like one of the 7 wonders of the world for me so any help is appreciated 

Do a search of my profile, back in my earliest posts, I put up at least one convo.. and there's another one hidden around here somewhere. Also if you look at Ballgames old posts I helped him with a ton of his back in the day. 

So I basically met this girl on an office day out to an exhibition. I was with the office people, musing in this show- when I see this cute little brunette. At first I don't really bother bolting across the room to meet her- which would have been cool and fun- but completely unnatural. SO I kept musing. Musing continues until she catches my eye again, being in a place a decent distance away from the coworkers n shit- so I approach- have a fun little conversation- bit of fluff- and grab her number. Classic MW number close (you like ice cream? sure, we're gonna grab one- blah blah blah) Before I leave her, I tell her we're gonna grab a sorbet (she's lactose intolerant apparently)

Me: Tell me you eat chocolate -Eli

Her: Mm I'm not meant to. (I do cave sometimes though)

Me: Little bit of decedence never hurt anybody ay? Bide in every toilet :) (Callback Humour)

Her: True that! And I am actually allowed to eat dark chocolate... (I'm Black, yum.)

Me: Sounds like a winning combo, what're you up to next week? Let's grab that sorbet (Again, lactose intolerant.)

Her: Well my lectures don't start for a while so I'm pretty free at the moment. I'm gonna be around covent garden tuesday afternoon??

Me: Lovely. I'll be working til 6 every day next week- how about an evening drink

Her: Sounds good :) only day I definately can't do is friday, so just lemme know when would be good for you

-Called her to organize some shit. Meeting literally 10 minutes away from my place, 10 minutes walk away also from a pool bar (thanks again manboob.)

Her: Yeah if you want someone to thrash at pool you've definately chosen the right person! Just lemme know the place and I'll be there! :)

Me: Up for a good thrashing ay? Haha. I like. :). Meet me at xx station for half 7 :)

Her: Ok see you later! :)

We got out a first time to a little pool bar in my area. We play pool, I take first makeout by the pool table when she beats me. Tease, tease, "Let's go watch some cartoons", I'd been monologuing for a bit about how much I love cartoons and nostalgia, some of the greteast feelings in the world yadda yadda (Conviction, love you manboob.) So I drag her out of this bar, and we walk to my place. On the way I pull her into an alleyway, push her up against the wall, makeout hard, explore her body for a bit, then move on. We just walk all the way to my place afterwards- and chilld on the sofa. And watch cartoons for a bit. Then I decide sex time. Makeout, touching, suck her titties. She says "No, not today", I ease up, watch some more cartoons, then wash rinse repeat. At one point she's straddling me and I'm having a fucking beastly time undoing those FUCKING skinny jeans. No go. "Not today, not today." I don't sweat it, walk her to the bus stop after she misses her last train and doesn't know the area- then buh-bye girl, hello blueballs.

Me: Enjoyed our little cartoon session, got me very nostalgic... among other things ;)

Her: Yeah thanks for everything I had a good time. Same here... ;)

Me: Haha, I take it you enjoyed your little prize then- little pool prodigy

Her: Haha i know right!!! I'm seriously good.. Although I did realise afterwards you may have let me win?? Pretty devastating revelation

Me: Who me? Never :P I'll give you a call later and we'll sort out this sorbet

Her: Noo is that an admission of guilt? So upsetting :P haha. Sorry i missed your call i was having dinner with my family. On the way back to London now. When were you thinking for sorbet? :)

Me: Tuesday evening is good for me beavis (callback humour) ;)- up for it?

[ Logistical Setting up shit ]

Me: Sweet. Sorbet thursday 7ish it is then beb ;)

[ Organised everything but WHERE we were meeting up ]

Her: Ok sounds good :) see ya then

Forgot my phone at home the day of the meetup, so it didn't happen. Basically we both flaked. I feel like shit also, so I go home, see a text on my phone asking where I'm thinking for the meetup (whoops)- call to say "whoops, fucked up.", no answer, so I just sleep. Get this apologetic text later

Her: I'm so sorry eli! I assumed the date wasn't happening and then didn't see your call..."

Cool, I just flaked, I can live with that. :P

Me: No worries beb. Forgot my phone at home this morning, silly me. Somehow caught the plague too- you'd have definitely caught it. raincheck? ;)

Her: aah ok no worries. Yeah ok. Hope you feel better soon!

I invite her out randomly while I'm in town, it's already pretty late and impulsive, so it doesn't happen. I text more random shit and invite her out mid-through a lion king convo with

Me: Rafiki is my spirit animal :P Let's grab lunch on Sunday

Her: Yeah sounds good

Me: Sweet :) Let's meet at xx station for 1 tomorrow (boom, nice and specific.)

Her: Ok see you then!

She her again some weeks later, same stuff. But no pull. Lunch, and some petting in a coffee shop.

Her: Thanks for today I really enjoyed it. Hope you found something to do :P. haha (ended our date with time to kill, met a mate.)

( More fluff shit. )

Her: Aah yeah family dinner is always a good shout. Also.. you're a veryy good kisser :)

Me: You've got cute little lips. I like sucking on them

No reply LOL

See her again some weeks later, ice cream shop near her place- we have ice cream, makeout, I say we're going to her place to listen to some artist I recommended her. We get there, and fuck- while listening to the artist I recommended her (Allen Stone fyi, good soulful shit.). Fuck for a good 2 hours, She sucks and swallows. Good shit, then watch some more cartoons. And I leave, work in the morning.

After fucking this girl I text her this the next day.

"That little look you get in your eye when you break from a kiss is sexy- Almost made up for the disappointing waffle Haha" (Ice cream place waffle was NOT a waffle)

She goes to Venice for the weekend with her family a few days later.
Then left a few days before sending this

"*Name*? Whassatt? *in the cutest voice I could physically pull off, of course*" (Callback humour)

Then left a week giving her a call. No answer.

I'm slightly confused as to why this chick ran cold and unresponsive so quick.
(Likely relevant info: The weekend after I fucked this chick I got tonsillitis- ate her pussy and did at one point think "no way I got this shit from eating pussy"- then dismissed it shortly afterward.) Any insights?

Cheers!
eli

Hm very interesting read ;) Congratz man! Lol 

As far as her acting weird I would just keep doing what you're doing, it's obviously working. Don't proceed to chase harder because she's slightly withdrawn. It may be a test, or she may be going through something tough right now. Don't change things up too much but maybe ask her if she's going through something right now. Then you can maybe liken it to when your turtle died back in the day lol

Yoyo!

This one is for MW for him to get a sense of how my text game looks. I get most of my numbers/FBs from online game (gotta do more daygame). My process with online girls is to send as a first message something related to her profile, something a bit teasing or funny. Then banter a bit, get their FBs where we chat a bit more, I also send them a quick voice message thru FB and then get the number and try to get her out.

I chose this one because it's one of the most recent ones and because I got the number quicker than usually (cuz I went for it faster). Exotic looking 18 yo girl, in her profile she mentioned that she likes Kpop, japanese culture, korea...that that was good for me as I am a sexy asian. Unfortunately it's not the best example I am usually more creative and playful btw.

Started on 3.11. sunday

Nice! looks like someone here is an expert on kpop :)

Hello! quite agree, it's mine favorite music style lately :)

Korina? (her name), you are definitively not czech, you look like rumanian or hungarian ;)

Well I am half (czech), my mom is czech and my dad is from greece :)

Aaaa I knew it, and I am 100% awesome, that's my nationality

Good attitude :D

dont be a shy girl and look at my private pic, dont worry there are no dirty pics...unfortunately :D (there this asian meme and a self pic without a shirt on, got a sixpack, v shape body, but still skinny.) Now thinking about the meme i should probably delete it, it doesn't communicate good stuff about asians

:D

Sexy glasses huh? :D

Too good :D

I know, you look like an angel with that blonde hair, but IMO you are a devil

Thanks for the nickname :D, true,appearance can be deceiving

Haha I knew it :) do you like ice cream?

Yes, I do :D why are you asking? :)

Awesome, gimme your facebook, lets have a ice cream eating competition, the one who loses by eating less icecream will give the other person a backrub.

I am good at massaging people's backs, so try to beat me ;)

Ok my facebook is ____

Go check your FB you devil :P

A few minutes later she adds me and the convo is not on facebook.

Hey, have you ever had bubble tea? it's amazing. (it's like a liquid combination of an icecream/tea/pure deadly sugar...though it tastes pretty good. It's from China btw)

yea, it's not bad

yea icecream is better, bubble tea is pure sugar :/

true, we will get some icecream together

yep, where are you from prague? I am from near (a neighbourhood)

(says her neighbourhood)

ok, you will teach me greek and I will teach you how to swear in chinese

unfortunately i cant say even one word in greek :D, but I would be interested in the chinese :D

yea, we gotta learn korean together and start a kpop band

that's a really good idea :D I already know some words so we can start

yea I have lots of good ideas :P

It looks like :D

(I notice she looks really tall on some photos) grrr you dont have your profile filled in, you could be a 130 cm dwarf ( 4 feet 4 inches) and I wouldn't even know :P

I am sorry :D I am not a dwarf :D

I dunno if i should trust you :P how tall are you? 170? (5 feet 7 inches)

trust me, 167 cm (5 feet 6)

haha cool, I am gonna take a look at your fb profile, you can spy on mine profile ;)

lol you have eyes like an asian :D

:D one person already told me that as well

Send her a voice message :heeey, what's up girlie (it sounds much better in czechm I also say it in a teasing way), I don't really know how to pronouce your name, is it korina (in czech) or korina like in english, it sounds better in english. whatever I am just gonna call you Korea, it's the best name ever!

Agree, it sounds better in english :D, btw and korea doesn't sound bad :D

Send me a voice message as well :3 so i know that you dont have a manly voice :P

Maybe next time, I assure you that I dont have a manly voice

haha you shy girl :P

gimme your number, dont worry i wont call now

I am a bit sick now, but once I am healthy we'll do the icecream competition

my number _____, ok, get well soon, then we head: direction icecream :D

message her on her phone (hey save me as Princ (my name), and you will be my icecream princes :D)

ok now you got my number

ok Prince (my name)

A day later

Princ (my name) is having a conference, come join me :)

ok what kind of conference? :)

A royal/kingly conference between the prince and the princess (you) ;) thru skype, but without webcam

It would be an honor, but I am kinda tired today ;)

ya, first day after the holidays huh? studying is a torture (it's a czech saying that rhymes)

someting like that :D

A day later

Hey, I feel like eating icecream! let's do the icecream competition, you Korea :P

Me as well, but it would be better to do towards the end of the week :)

yea, too much school now huh? I think i could on thursday or maybe on the weekend

Yea quite a lot of it, but the weekend is better

yea if its english i can tutor you :P

I dont have problems with english, but we have a lot of stuff to do this week so I would do it rather on the weekend

ok on the weekend we will learn korean :D

ok, looking forward to it :D

So she's already heard my voice, my plan is to call her before the weekend and then set up a date near my place (at the metro). Buy some icecream and groceries and use it as "an excuse" to go my place (I am not being appologetic about it). Walk to my place 15 min, chill at my place, icecream and then go for sex on the first date.

Any critiques? ideas?

This is pretty decent. The fact you're getting girls out with any style is what counts ;)

I warn You I just got a text converter :)

Convo 1:
Hit up an old number from over a month ago. She works long hours for nike.

3:06 Get home safe mrs busy bee- Kiddish

3:06 Haha already in bed

3:22 You better be wearing some awesome Nike jammies

next day 4:10 PM Hey punk how's the hard work?

4:34 Done for the day haha, headed to watch some football!

6:07 Go!... whatever team, when's the game over?

6:08 They just delayed the game for bad weather:(

6:35 Sad panda. I'm cooking a feast, come help

6:59 I'm a below-average cool at best...

         Cook*

7:08 I'll teach you to cool, just need a helper ;)

8:31 haha I feel like you're trying to flirt with me 

9:19 Not hard enough, I'm going to get a boom box and sing love songs with your name

9:30 I challenge you to find one song. 

next day 8:13 PM Boo, you causing trouble??

8:18 Boo? Haha

8:20 You'd make an adorable Casper ;P

8:21 Haha well that will surely help me in life

8:27 Maybe not in life, but you could haunt people and... Not pay taxes

Two days 8:20 PM How's work busybutt :)

Next day 11:32 AM Hey. Been super busy. You??

5:42 (Pic of a baby goat on my back) Save me!

I let this die for some silly reason, texted back a month later

7:21 PM Boo

(pic of me with some elvis dudes)

New Orleans says hi :)

7:44 In New Orleans??

Two days 4:22 PM I wish, just got back. This city is so gloomy : /

4:23 Come get me some hot chocolate!

5:59 Ha I'm just leaving work

6:04 Perfect, do you know ctown?

6:05 Yeah why

6:11 We need hot chocolate, I like the one on 3rd

6:12 Haha I don't need hot chocolate. I have a workout scheduled 

6:16 Lame, and your soul does NEED hot chocolate

6:21 What if I had hot chocolate yesterday?

6:25 You didn't invite me?... Jerk

Now my soul needs two hot chocolates

6:31 I didn't, I'm a coffee girl
7:04 You're still buying the cocoa... I like extra marshmallows

7:22 I'm sorry, since you keep asking me out I should probably let you know I'm dating someone 

8:01 Ok... He's buying?
 

I'd like some feedback on this one

Some background:

She's half white half filipino. In my dance class. 18. In a sorority.

Last week I rode the train back home with her for a bit. Talking. She got off at my stop and to talk to me a little longer, flirting a lot and was grinding me against a pillar and letting me touch her butt. This is broad daylight.

Today she did a dance where she told the story of how a butterfly came to her room when she was 8 and played with it until it died.

[we had a couple of texts before this just confirm phone #s]

Me: A butterlfy just came into my room, I think I'm going to play with it

Her: Don't kill it

Me: It can talk

Her: Are you on something?

Me: It says that it's great great great..grandma was killed 10 years ago

Me: By an 8 year old hirl

Me: *girl

Me: I had two puffs of weed for the first time yesterday

Her: Hahaha oh wow

Me: I didn't like it tho

Her: why?

Me: Just not my thing

Me: It says it was a Filipino girl who did it

Her: The one and only time I smoked weed I was 13 haha. And maybe the butterfly was just old

Me: Hold on. According to reports the girl might've been half white and may have a thing for Mexicans

Me: Her dancing seems to be just average

Me: Gee (her name), I wonder who did that

Her: I wonder

Me: These are very serious crimes, I may have to teach her a lesson

Me: Hey do you like ice cream 

Her: I like frozen yogurt

[This was pretty cool, I had no idea what to do with that text when a girl walked by. I asked her and she told me about this place close to the uni with frozen yogurt. Get your info on the spot!]

Me: Cool, get some with me. I know a good place that has good frozen yogurt for filipines that hang out with Mexicans

Me: And who've killed butterflies

[so far she'd been replying right away, but not this one. After I sent the next text she replied fast again. Easy logistics (close to uni) ftw]

Me: It's in front if president circle

Her: Hahaha perfect! Ugurt?

Me: Ya

Me: I'm pretty free, so whenever is good

Her: I can't all this week

Me: I'm in no hurry

Me: Next weeks ok

Her: Okay:)

Me: Kk. See ya Friday :]

I'm not sure about the timing for asking for the meetup. Not sure about smily faces (lol), sometimes they feel right, but sometimes I conflict between will it make me look like a fag or is it kinda cold if I don't send one. And overall too, I don't text a lot.

Also, she wasn't giving me much. From my experience with hotter girls I interpreted this as she wants to see if I can keep my cool without her giving me anything to work with. I think this is the case, how do you guys feel about this?

sup fellas this thread looks like its getting active . i got another one..backstory with this girl I know her from a class , she put her number in my phone like a month ago but I never really texted her until now.

me: ay I heard some stuff about you

her: what?

me: that u sucked 3 dicks in 1 minute

her: shutup liar! (x

me:nah seriously, if its true i give you props;p..how was court ms criiminal

her: ahahaha no dude wtf thats weird! ahahaha it went good im off probabtion! 

me: its not weird its skill;p and cool your going places in life

her: ahaha well to me is is dude! ahaha yea I guessssss :p

me: yur just weird and so you can blaze and make fun of old people now?

her: ahahaha yess dude (x

me: interesting lets test out those rookie lungs thursday..if u can

No reply its been a day...Im thinking just get her to feel more comfortable in person..what do you guys think. And what should I text her next

I'm no expert, but it might be that you went for the meetup out of nowhere. A fun vibe had been established, but not a flirty one. How is it between you two in person?

You're inviting her to smoke right? Actually invite her to smoke, make it sound awesome, but make it a bit clearer that's what's happening. 

Jove I would say here you were texting too much without getting replies. Yes there are convos with more texts from the guy, but here it's apparent you're chasing attraction or something. Something didn't go down right during the "in person". 

 in person she's like put your finger through the hole in my pants on my asscheeks and rub it type shit

 

im thinking something like 

lets take a trip to cloud 9 above the clouds  or some stupid shit .. thanks 

Then you need to be a bit more "high value" in your texting mang. You're responding too much, not giving her a chance to respond. ALSO, in place of some of this texting you should be replacing it with some high value lifestyle stuff. You're in college, you share a dance class with her, she's in a sorostitution. There's plenty to talk about in that direction

yeah, you're exactly right. Also that she's hotter than I'm used to being into me, so I gave into the chasing. 

So this one again from online...I visited her profile and she immediately visited mine. I used one of the weaker openers. A 22 yo blonde stewardess, pretty cute, like a 8 for nerds like u guys :P

8th Nov. Friday around 6 PM

Try to make me laugh? make you cry would be easier :P and also dont spy on my profile

:D not a lot of things can make me cry :)

Can i ask you something weird?

oh jesus :D yea?

you are attractive, how many hearts have you broken? my guess is 90

you would be suprised but they do that to me :)

tsss dont be humble

so to which city should i buy my plane ticket (she's a stewardess)

wherever you want, but i dont have time for meeting passangers :D, and they really i dont break hearts

anyway I think you are the kind of stewardess who ditches work and flirts with passangers :P

nooo i cant afford to do that :)

ya a friend of mine is a stewardess at Emirates and she complained about having a thrown off sleeping schedule, u have it as well dont you? u woke up like half an hour ago (6 PM)

I wanna try emirates next year :) , yaaa i can fall asleep anytime, when i am K.O :D

ya u will live in dubai where Indians will spy on you and grope you in public transportation :D u wont be able to shake them off

:D thats my dream :D I think i wont have a problem with finding a guy whole will pay for everything for me :D

tsss you gold digger :P I can totally see you in America digging gold in gold mines, when you get trapped in a gold mine I will come to save you

:D tss I am not a gold digger :D

tsss dont be a shy girl and check out my private pic, dont worry no nasty stuff there, unfortunately :D

(she sees mine)

show me yours, (she shows them, some underwear pic and no bra pics but covered nipples)

ya, you are a skinny guy :) (notice how I don't respond to this)

You must be really bored at home huh?

whyy?

I will be your boss and you will fly more often

poor dog, he's all alone at home while you are travelling all around the world

:D I am glad that I am home and that i have a few days off :D

I have 2 dogs

lol so they are alone at home? :D

So nobody walks them or feeds them

it must look really messy at your place :D

they are at my parents

do you like icecream?

i do, why?

awesome, let's have an icecream eating competition, who eats more of it wins and the loser gives a backrub to the other person

oh i am good at massages, so try to beat me

:D :D :D I cant too much icecream, then i gain weight

so another competition

and you will give me the backrub anyways (baiting me to suplicate and do stuff for her, I am aware of it right on the spot)

So who eats a cone and 2 scoops of icecream faster

I don't give massages just like that :P

:D that would work :D

awesome, gimme your FB

i dont have FB :D

wait what? :D do you live in a cave?

:D no i have :D ofc i have :D

ufff, i was suprised, whats your name there?

(name)

(on her profile pic she's kissing a dog) omg you really are shameless, you are blatantly cheating on me on your profile pic, tsss

On FB 

(name of a village)?

On your profile u had prague, you totally took advantage of me!

:D u suprised huh

tsss

I hope you dont mind

I dont mind, but apologize to my feelings :P, that dont exist

:D oh please

do you have any more suprises for me? are you a transexual? :D

i am not :D dont by silly :D do i look like one? :D

what your name?

(send her a 20 sec voice message)

hey first mistake

I hate it when you make fun of my last name (it's a birds name)

the second one, i see your name is ___

Ya i told you what my real name is, damn chinese it complicates everything

but thanks that you voice called me like that

but in china it must be beautiful

(send her another voice message)

I will send u a one as well :D

do you have fb on your phone?

yes

i had to record it on my iphone. cuz it doesnt work on pc

but my phone is far away

dont be a lazyass, your dog ate your phone anyways

:D they dont eat my things

why are you at home today? why aren't u partying today

(voice message to tell her to gimme her number, that this chatting and typing on fb is too nerdy for me)

aa i see you live in (a neighborhood)

:D

number that fast?

well, i have voice calls for free

so it would work :D

(my number)

you spy! (prefer to use "stalker" but not everyone in CZ knows what the word means, facepalm)

well after i finish watching a tv show :D

I gotta go soon

and you arent watching it anyways

and you are trying to seduce me :P

yea, that's my intention, where are you going?

she calls me, we talk for about 20 min. She sounds like a really cool chick, I tease her, accuse her of something also use some silly voices.

ON FB a few min after the call

enjoy watching the tv show

it ended already :)

haha i ruined it for you, enjoy your friday night

nooo :)

;) nah i didn't, i made your day better

yea you actually did :) thank you :)

my pleasure

:) sir, you are fun :D

messaged her the next day a bit (Saturday) and tomorrow (sunday) she will probably travel 50 miles to see me to have an icecream eating competition and to film a TV cooking show that's 100x better, funnier and more sexy than Jamie Oliver's, gonna talk tomorrow and if we wont hangout tomorrow I am pretty sure we will hang within next 10 days (she doesnt have work)

Gonna introduce her to my Mr. Dickinson

EDIT: Jon, why when in edit mode the text color are right, but when reading this post on forum, some lines of text are not colored? :O I turned whole sections of text to blue, and then colored some lines red.

No clue mang, but great texting job. You're doing well 

hey I want to know if I could still get this one back. What could I text next?? heres the whole text from the beginning

me:  i wanna see u but this dumbass security guard wont let me into the zoo... can you escape???

her: LMFAO asshole xD

me: foreal i was going to take u a snack ;p whats crackin

her: haha sup lame (:

me: the sky

her: shut up

me: make, me :D

her: *slap* (;

me: *turns asian* you didnt say what u slapped;p

her: your face duhh! ((; haha

me: face means ass where im from u perv

her: you know you liked it (:< haha

me: sshh..sometimes you make me feel like im just a peice of meat

her: lmaaooo ! what how?!! :ooo

me:  idk ;) whassup with the sesh (my attempt at meetup -.-)

no reply

me: jerk:/ (5 hours later)

her:Asshole /-\

me: im hungry

her: u want a sandwhich (:

me: not from you

her: ass

me: im jk id love one lmao

her: too bad!

me: aww pumper 

me: you couldnt make one anyway :)

her: hmmm yeaaaaaahhH! :p

me: sure ! Would you say your experienced in maiking sanwhiches? (Right here I must of been high )

her: weirdoo (lmao)

me: im fucking around chill

her: so am I

me: cool..my left side o f my body hurts 

5 hours later

me: still waiting on that sandwhich pfftt scum

hahahahahah after reading that I realized im such a bitch.  I was thinking wait  2 weeks and get more ho's in the meantime. What could I text next

whalecock, in my opinion your texting was going pretty great at the beginning but then you started a competitive frame towards the end. This is something it took me forever to stop doing, sometimes you just have to NOT say whatever funny shit you think of to reply, and just change the subject or make it a joke that somehow reestablishes the "me and you" frame. 

I'm not saying don't be cheeky and test her a little, it's just that she wants to be flirting, not trying to outwit you or have to defend herself.

eg: 

her: weirdoo (lmao)

me: im fucking around chill

her: so am I

Yeah this girl hasn't explicitly said, or even implied that she's at all showing up tomorrow, huh? Some girls try to pull that card, it's annoying. Guys do it too, like Rogan. 

I would just ask her a logistical question that confirms things better. Something like, "Hey listen.. 8pm works better for me tomorrow I can't make it before then. That work? I got to wash off my bat jet someone drew a huge penis on it" 

You can leave the last part on there or take it off.

Yes you can cancel your membership at any time. It releases new content to your account every month 

Whaleballs were you referring to meeting up and smoking out with her? 

to the darkrain I know exactly and see what I must do now. thanks and to the manwhore, yes. Where im from we just say sesh.

sometimes i feel like they know that if we meet up, were going to fuck, thats why they hesitate and shit. or maybe im just high

Yes and that's why you have to play it a bit better

Yes the point of that text was to draw that out.. that come to find out she wasn't sure this was serious, so we brought it up in a way where we could address it without making it awkward. And as you can see it worked like a charm. I'll take a look at your date write-up later

Try the "cloth condom" next time?

Yeah hang out with her and go for it again. Don't relent on that it excites the hell out of her let her do your thing and you do yours. You're fine nothing to worry about here

So I went on a Mexico trip with this girl and I left my passport in her car...

Girl: Hey I have your passport!

Me: Thanks for reminding me, when could I come pick it up?

Girl: Umm can I give it to Christina because I feel like she sees you more often!

Me: Haha sure that works, we need to change that!

4 hours later...

Me: Hey how about this, we go get some ice cream and in exchange I get my passport

Girl: If your paying I'm down

Sure go for it Steve. 

Will do MW, I'll let you know how it goes.

girls seems to shut me down* whenever I show sexual intent or some kind of it in text,

so there's chick #1 , I added randomly on FB , she seems to have a boyfriend but is very positive toward me. at one point she says I want you to know that I'm very glad I've met you here ( like 3rd msg she sends ) and I say I don't consider anyone my friend unless I meet them in real life here's my # fb is so boring bla bla ... and she says ok I'll call u but my phone is off right now ( I dunno if she was telling the truth or not and I don't care ) but she promised to call , and we decided to go see a movie, anyway everything was going smooth untill I said

= ok here's three kisses untill I see you tomorrow

+ lol I dont want them , keep them to yourself [1]*

= did I just waste three kisses ? :( 

+ I dunno

= forget about it , give it backkkk

+ I never took it :p

( I change subject )

she was supposed to show up that night, so we can set the time for tomorrow. but she didn't. she told me earlier she's going somewhere and maybe she can't show up but she didn't call either. I msg'd her like 10 days later , saying I saw that movie it was a good one u should see it too , but I was deactive on FB so she couldn't have replied. I sent another msg like 1 month after hey I saw some1 the other day looking just like u she was so cute bla bla anyway I was thinking abt u, unlike you,... Y U NO send me a msg and say hi hahaa

am I on the right track here ? 

here's chick #2

she added me on fb before , I got her to invest and chase me more than any girl I know in this world. actually I didn't do anything , she was the one gaming me. so I msg her like 3months after on fb

= if you still wanna be friend here's my #

+ are u single ? 

= I'm going to gym now, give me a missed call and we'll talk tonight

+ ok

so she calls me 15mins later. (19:15) 

I give her a miss call at 00:06 and she texts me at 00:33

+ hi, u called me ?

= yup , wanted to see if u r awake , what r u upto

+ I'm awake :)

= :)) try again I already know that

+ ok we were supposed to talk , how come u want to be friends now ?

= I saved u under ABC , do you like it :pppppppp

+ why ABC ? :|

= :D it's actually great that you don't like it :p is it that bad ?

+ I don't mind :|

= damn :/ now I have to come up with something else :)) what r u doing tomorrow , where do u live

+ where do U live ?? :D how old were you again ??

= what was I thinking :'(

+ why ?? what did I say ?? I recall u said u were with someone, are u single now ? and u said u live near XYZ as far as I can remember

= yup , right u've won :) now tell me where u live

+ near DNBD, now u answer my Q

= is that the place near BDAB ? what was ur Q again ? don't ask silly Qs so I can answer

+ I'm not silly , u r being silly , no we live at AXSX. what happened to your girlfriend? huh ? :|

= oh god wheres AXSX ???? near that school ? if u mean my bf , he became too needy so I had to ditch him lol hahhaaa

+ bf ? boyfriend ? :| u making fun of me ? AXSX is located near....

= no why would I make fun of such a good girl :p oh that's actulally a lil far 

+ tell me more about yourself ...

= u can find out urself ... let's go to ABC tomorrow , is it even open ?

+ tomorrow ?? :-o , I can't go out very often, u need to know that and also I work too :D

= thats becuz u r such a niceeeee gal :) ok we can be text-buddies and text each other untill u run outta credit :))) works for me :p

+ silly :p we'll see each other but not that very often , are you ok with that? any problem? :)

= no I don't mind , however fits u best :) where do u work , when are u at work 

+ I go to work everyday at ABC, and I also go to university too , what abt u ?

= I told u before , I go to that university near u ... so u r pretty busy huh ?

+  yup , I don't waste my time , how old are u ? and what do u study ?

= can u call ?

+ no I'm at home , I can't :(

= I'm hugging my pillow now , u can go do the same :p

+ why ?? thats stupid :| [2]*

= u think I'm stupid :( ?

+ maybe :)))))) how old are you ??????????????????????????????

= I'm turning 21 next month , let's see what u have for me then :p ur not going out tomorrow ? gimme a call me so I can hear if u have a sexy voice or not

+ I didn't like what you just said, I'm going to sleep , have a good night [3]*

I decided not to text her, she seems childish to me , any thoughts? 

^ That's why 3rd graders shouldn't have cell phones

sup fellas I have a question. I have an old phone, idk if this even fucking matters, but my outbox always sends the same message while my phone is in my pocket. Its weird ass fuck and my phone has the lock screen option but it fucking fails .

Anyway, what do I do from something like this?

me: where im from mustard doesnt exist :)

her: good I wanna be where your from ;)

me: WakeNBakeN (I thought this was funny at the moment

her: ahahaha X)

me: I just got home whats crackin

me: wow wtf just so you know none of this shit up here ^^^^^ was me

then it sent like 4 times

me: wow wtf just so you know none of this shit up here ^^^^^ was me

me: wow wtf just so you know none of this shit up here ^^^^^ was me

me: wow wtf just so you know none of this shit up here ^^^^^ was me

me: wow wtf just so you know none of this shit up here ^^^^^ was me

She never replied and I didnt know the message sent 4 times so right now I sent

me: ur shit (from that infinity dude)

she replied with 

her: ur shit

So pretty much it looks like I sent her like 10 messages, but like 5 of them were the same shit.  Some trippy shit, how she still replied right now..where should I go from here?

I just checked my cellular, it looks like it happened with another one.

me: im hungry

her: u want a sandwhich (:

me: not from you

her: ass

me: im jk id love one lmao

her: too bad!

me: aww pumper 

me: you couldnt make one anyway :)

her: hmmm yeaaaaaahhH! :p

me: sure ! Would you say your experienced in maiking sanwhiches? (Right here I must of been high )

her: weirdoo (lmao)

me: im fucking around chill

her: so am I

me: cool..my left side o f my body hurts 

5 hours later

me: still waiting on that sandwhich pfftt scum

(3 days later)

me: still waiting on that sandwhich pfftt scum

me: still waiting on that sandwhich pfftt scum

me: still waiting on that sandwhich pfftt scum

me: still waiting on that sandwhich pfftt scum

me: still waiting on that sandwhich pfftt scum

me: still waiting on that sandwhich pfftt scum

her: haha crimsonchin x)

her: shut up looser ;p

me: wttf

me: my ass sent u those ;p

no reply

Where do i go from here aswell? thanks g's

Well you need to arrange a meetup dude. Until then there's nothing to gauge. What are you trying to do here? First step is go for the meetup

Hold on bro you're  describing some kind of ED problem now? 

Holmes why are you being so cloak and dagger about the fact that you fucked her? That is SO weird. lol

Steve one thing I'd mention is that you still must execute proper game. The context of this meetup is a bit "off", it's still doable, but I think the way you introduced the frame of "I'm bribing you to get my passport back rather than flirting with you' isn't the best setup, but in the end facetime is what counts. So make it happen cap'n. 

Okay so a girl MIA!

So day(or two) before this message we had a phone call both had fun and shit.

day1

Me: Heya should we see each other some day?

Her: Could try :) (Bad translate from my language but in a way its like ''I quess we could try''''

Me: Imma call tomorrow or smthin!

day 2: call her doesnt pick up 

day3: no contact

day 4: Me: Whats up, you went missing got scared or something (bad translate)

day 5 morning: her:What would of I got scared of? :D ja where have I gone missing? :D

me: I pulled of bravely a morning call, isnt that kinda scary?

her: apparently yeah cos I havent noticed/seen it :D

Soo here we are, I fucked up earlier on abit and after it she has been collldd AS FUCK. Last time we saw she was blushing and shit, she isnt interested anymore or is playin games! I have a history of just dropping her off cold for months because I didnt keep my shit together, so I think she is tryin to play some games. Or just isnt interested, dont give a fuck which one it is tbh.

Probably just gonna go with ''Luring girls tonite with candies , you like skittles or M&Ms?''