LR: Another Plentyoffish Bang Special
March 23, 2012
This girl was basically seduced by the time I met up with her, both thru plentyoffish messaging and then later thru text messaging. In fact she was going down on me within 20 minutes of picking her up from outside her place
She actually messaged ME on pof which was awesome. I don’t get hotties hitting me up on pof that often. But ya this girl was adorable and a really awesome girl and hopefully something happens for us.
She brought it up in her 1st msg, and then I teased her that I would have to kick her ass at thumbwar. To which she said something along the lines of her hands being too small so she would be at an unfair advantage lol. A couple text messages later I used my typical pof phone # close line, which gets a # about 90% of the time. I’d post it up here but I don’t want Google indexing it and girls finding it. Believe me, it’s happened before.
Anyways the game moves to the phone..
Me – 2 mins later: Psst what. No rock paper scissors here girl
Me: Not havin it!
Girl – 1 min later: Well, if it’s a thumb war you want, I’m using my nails.
Me – 2 mins later: Ahh damn that is some mean shit. Pretty much defenseless here
Me – 2 mins later: So whatd you do for presidents day. I just stayed home n puttered around in my new apt. I made a dresser. Gonna make a shelf unit now while I drink lol
Me: Come help me!!
Girl – 1 min later: That sounds so safe! 😀 I didn’t do much for presidents day. Scooped up some cat shit, made some chicken shit, went to work and shit.
Girl: You really want a woman to help BUILD a shelf unit? Can I just build you a sandwhich instead?
Girl – 1 min later: My apologies! I’m a dick! 😉 I’ll help you right away, sir.
Me: Uhm. ya that sounds perfect. But I dont have bread. I got everything else tho. Wait you made some chicken shit? Dunno if I can trust your cooking. Ok fine Im hungry
Girl: If I had a teleportation device I would zap my way into your kitchen. And I’ll bring bread.
Me: Im hungry right now when you getting here woman. Hey you have that cannibal movie on dvd?
Girl: I wish! I can most certainly make that happen though.
Me: Oh what. You dont have a teleportation device what the fuck is wrong with you
Girl – 2 mins later: Where is your teleportation device?? Let me borrow it.
Me: K maybe not tonight (tho that would be cool) but later.. pfff
Me – 4 mins later: Hey bs not true come over right now Im building this you can watch and drink beer with me. Fuck teleportation dont you know how to drive
Girl: I’m a WOMAN! Of course I dont!
Me – 3 mins later: Right I knew that honestly.
Girl: I’m also part asian so that doesn’t help
Me: Well wtf. Where are you maybe I will drive my spaceship
Girl: I’d prefer to be picked up by hover craft. Sorry.
Me – 1 min later: Excuse me thats like preferring a taxi to a limo. I mean I know girls prefer the simple things in life but dont be ri-dick-ulous
Girl: Its better for the environment???
Me – 13 mins later: No. They both use vaginas as fuel
Girl – 4 mins later: Damn. Yeah, that’s terrible.
Me – 2 mins later: Ya what a waste. Well anyways borg youre obviously not coming Im going to pop in a movie and pass out unceremoniously
Girl – 4 mins later: Yeah I’m falling asleep! My bad sir.
Girl: Try not to dream of me
Me – 1 day 10 hrs later: Hello senorita mellyfresh. Cant remember if I dreamed of you. Did dream about aliens tho
Girl – 2 hrs 35 mins later: Alien dreams are terrifying! Sorry my phones been dead!
Me – 4 mins later: All good pumpkin. Hows your day been going I got my case dismissed at court. Im too gangster
Girl – 11 mins later: What a G! My days good. Just showered, about to have some coffee, baby’s gone for the night. Makes me sad! What’s your case all about?
Me – 4 mins later: Bein gangster. K lets hang out then if yer not busy that sounds cool
Me – 1 min later: Bring change we will play poker lol
Girl – 4 mins later: I don’t really play poker and all that jazz
Me – 1 min later: Lmao perfect
Me: Well if you dont want to hang out Ill go out with buddies. You didnt come up with an alternative
Girl – 2 mins later: Poker is the only option? 😉
Me – 2 mins later: Lol NO. Sounded hilarious tho. You get ice cream Ill get beer
Me – 2 mins later: We can go see a movie too but not sure anything good out I havent seen
Girl – 13 mins later: We can switch. Id ather have a beer than ice cream
Me – 2 mins later: Lol. Ice cream is 4 bucks beb. Get the ice cream Ill get the 12er. Make it something delicious. Does 8 work
Girl: You’re a turd. 8 sounds great
Me – 3 mins later: Im saving you money my lil wench. Whats yer address wait am I getting you or you driving. Either way
Girl – 4 mins later: You can come get me. And be my taxi for the evening
Girl – 1 min later: #### W $#$#%#$# blvd. Just call when you get here. You’d make a left once you got in the gate and I’ll come out to make shit less confusing
Me – 1 min later: Lmao. Where on w #$#%#%@@#
Girl – 2 mins later: Between S Fort #$*#$ and #$*#$*
Girl: Im across the street from baco #$*#. Im neighbors with chili’s (yayy)
Girl: Baco…hahahaha boca
Me – 13 mins later: Lol baco what the hell is that. you like bacon too much obviously
Girl: Its like a bacon taco
Girl – 56 mins later: Heyy, hate to bring this up last minute but I only got a babysitter til midnight so if you wanna do a different night its cool
Me – 1 min later: Naw we can make that happen. This way if yer crazy I have an excuse to boot you ; b
Girl: Hahaha good deal! Let me know when you’re on your way then 🙂
Me – 26 mins later: Leaving here in 15 itll take me 25 to get there
Girl: Okiedokie 🙂
Me – 39 mins later: Yea got a lil sidetracked there. 20 min
Girl: ADD kickin in? Hurry up slow poke!! 😉
Me – 1 min later: Pssh ya Ill give you a slow poke
Girl: Is that a sexual reference?
Me: No whats that
Girl – 1 min later: When a boy and a girl likes each other very much
Me: Im a virgin I hope you dont think youre gonna come over and try to take advantage of me or something
Girl: They do this thing called “fucking”
Girl: I’m going to rape you.
Girl: Too much?
Me: Oh shit thats what that is? No Im a giraffe I dont do that
Girl: How long are you?
Me: dammit. I promised my mom Id be good
Me – 1 min later: I dont know, you can find out in a sec
Girl: You’re on your way, correct?
Me: Im like 5 away
Girl: About damn time!
Me – 1 min later: I know right. wtf
Girl – 1 min later: Call me when you pull in so I can run out! Left, go all the way down and turn right and I’ll be outside standin there like a hooker.
Me: K where am I going. Boca plaza?
Girl – 1 min later: Across the street from there! I’m at the apartment complex called #*&$## next to #$#$
Me: i dont have any $1s. You take credit card?
Girl: Yeah, just swipe it in my butt crack.
Me: What street off #$(#$#$# am I turning on
Girl: I dunno where you are coming from? Where are you right now?
Girl: Wait, no. Its right on #[email protected]##%##
Me: Essex n #$(&*#$(&*#
Girl: By #()$*#)($# and S Fort #)$(*#$.
Me: esSex n #)$(*#)($*()
Girl: Damnit I wish I was more familiar with the area
Girl: You know how to get to #($###[email protected] and # fort #$#$#? You know where the #$#$ is right there?
Girl: I can just run over there if its easier for you
Me: Shit. me too- wish you were more familiar with your own area. Wtf do they keep you in a cage or something
Girl: Hahaha I just moved here from michigan, son
Me: All good babe keep your vagina dry Ill figure it out
Girl – 1 min later: Where are you now?
Girl: Im dry as desert
Me – 1 min later: #$(*&#$(*#$ n #$(*&#$#. Are you ok east or west side of fort #$#$# or does that not make sense lol
Girl – 1 min later: Yeah I don’t get it. Keep going down #$(*&#$##, pull into #$(*&# and I’ll meet you there, just to make it easier.
Girl: You’re not far
Me: Geezez christ thats not right that needs fixin’
Girl: #$(*&’s resturaunt, on your left on #$(*&#$##$#@. Go to it.
Girl – 4 mins later: Okiedokie?
Me – 1 min later: Well now Im the one standing out here like a hooker. Im $49 every half hr just so you know
Girl: You’re at chilis? hahaha
Me: Bring cash
Girl: Ill be there in like 10 seconds
Girl: With cash
So ya I’m hanging out in front of Chilis and she comes walking up looking oh so cute. She’s smiling and I pull her into me for a hug, she’s a small thing so I wrap all the way around her and then make her back up as I keep walking forwards after I grab her. I give her a kiss on her lips and she lingers so we kiss for a tiny bit then I move us off to my car while I cop a feel of her butt. It’s nice.
The car ride is fun and we get lost like a couple of dumbasses and then I find my way again. While we’re pulled over figuring things out I take this as an opportunity to take out my dick and show it to her, and then tell her to kiss it. She does and I like it.
I take her inside my place- and I’d said something about giving her a spanking ‘cuz she was misbehaving and as she walks in she leans over my couch and she’s like, “wait I’m getting a spanking?” and stands there waiting. I spank her butt and then slide her lil leggings down and then slide her panties down and start massaging her lil bottom and then run my hands up between her legs and play with her little pussy. I lean down and lick her from behind and then turn her over and lay her out on my couch and kiss it some more before putting her on her knees in front of me and taking out my cock. She looks like a lil dollbaby on her knees with my cock in her mouth enjoying herself looking up at me all coyly.
I then penetrate every hole in her body for hours. Seriously. This girl would not stop fucking. As soon as I thought it was over she’d attack me, get me hard any way she could and then start riding me again. She wanted anal. I’m not even a fan, but I obliged. By the time she was done I was pretty much a shriveled up corpse with not an ounce of moisture in me. The end
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