My Text Game Has Been Straight Garbage Recently..
Me: Whatsup lizzy its the sexy bearded guy from earlier
Me: This guy next to me is chewing celery like nobody's business
Me: Like geezus dude only im kewl enough to pull off that shit :P
Me: Lol whatcha up to
Me: If i brought my mom in you'd hook us up w free shit riiiight ;)
Her: Hmmmm interesting good thing he's not in the quiet library and lol i'm not sure about that :?
Me: If u do, anything off the dollar menu @mcdonalds is yours ;P
Her: Geez aren't i lucky
Me: Just playing :)
Me: A double scoop fest at X would b in order
Me: Whatcha doin rn tiger
*Next Day
Me: Moring babe, hope you're behaving. Til we meet up that is
Me: Got a lil roadtrip out to X tday, enemy territory..hows your day goin
Her: Lol my day is fine im just babysitting but whats your name again?
Me: Jihad
Me: I tried babysitting once
Me: Didnt know babies dont drink alc
Me: Weird
Me: Safe to say it was the last time lol
Her: Yeah sounds like tis probably not the job for you
Me: Nah kids luv me. I'd totally kick your ass in a bbysitting competition
Her: You probably would i just put alvin and the chipmunks on repeat
Me: We'd be better off as a team babylove. You whip up some chocolate chip cookies and i'll handle the booze lol
Her: Mhmm yes sounds like a plan
Me: Then we'll put the tykes off to bed (tie em up if we have to) and bust out the drinks to unwind and dine
Me: Hope you make good pancakes ;) bfast for dinner is the way to ma heart
Me: Dw i'll supervise, i dont want my lil tiger getting hurt
*4 hours later
Me: I'm rlly done w this whole 'stopping' @ red lights thing. they'll b giving me police escorts soon
*2 days later
Me: Hey goof i bet my weekend can beat up your weekend
WTF! I sound like a coked up Nazi...
on a bad day
I've taken all this too far and am erratic as fuck. Is this salvageable lol? Guys I don't want this poor girl to have a bad experience texting guys and giving out her num. I'm giving Hannibal Lecter vibes
This chick sux. Context? She's gaaaay. But not like Shikorah. The other gay
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Oh really? HA-HA! I'm awesome :)
So...I should probably do some behavior shaping here ya? A lil somethin somethin, playful disapprovyio, ynaw wut im sayin?
Yeah
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Me: Girl you're so boring, why can't you be more awesome. Like a poptart kitten on a rainbow
Yall like?
Gonna make her too defensive. Plus I'm getting the idea this is another (if not the same) "instagram model" and these chicks are of the autopilot instinuctual opinion (they're right) they simply never asked for any of this. So you can't expect anything of her or put her under some sort of social obligation to respond to you. It doesn't exist. So you have to go the route I described earlier, e.g. the "heavy hearted" stuff- which works on ALL of them (can't remember if it was your thread or Meow's but he fucked it up too haha), or bond with her in some way that supersedes her "don't talk to strangers" upbringing (like I mentioned in that old thread of yours), or simply offer some sort of value that she identifies with (like Meow's NYC party). These have all been brought up before but no one seems to really want to make those intuitive leaps. Oh well.. guess that's why I'm the world famous dating coach and you're not :p
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Nope this is not an instagram model. I met her at the downtown mall here and she works at a clothing store. She's a real cutie but she aint no model lol.
We talked about school. travel, studying, chewing loudly in quiet places etc. She seems like the shy nerd type but real cool once opened up. That's why I thought I was being the creep in this texting. We def had a good interaction.
Totally understand the "value" aspect of having things going on in your life to bring a girl too and I've seen it in action with my high school crush and some insta models ive been msging.
"Heavy hearted"? Are you talking about the gum-drop and sunshine thingy? I'd like to make the leap but I'm just not understanding it fully :/
That's the point of making a leap, derp. But yeah all still stands as previously stated.
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
"or bond with her in some way that supersedes her "don't talk to strangers" upbringing (like I mentioned in that old thread of yours)"
Ah the bonding! Like the whole get relevant topic with the highschool crush girl!
Ok so I need to shape her in a way that won't bring up any guards. Playful disapproval essentially but hit her harder yet softer.
AHHH..harder...yet softer....gahhh...I know what you mean! But I can't think of the words to express it....OH SHIT
Maybe?
Girl , you're the cutest poptart I've met in the box of deliciousness called life, don't leave me hanging that's lame.
^No one like lol?
Lol. That's pretty good
Girl you're the cutest poptart in this Life cereal box I've met recently. But when you leave me hanging like this I get worried. Are you getting soggy?
This might be a bit too much, but it's sharpening and honing the components you brought up in yours. When you make it a little more relatable it goes a long way. But in application I'd probably simplify it to maintain a bit more of an "aloof" vibe especially considering this girl's basically a stranger and doesn't warrant so much effort. At least that's what she'll think.
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Girl you're the cutest poptart I've met recently in this box of deliciousness called life. Don't leave me hangin...unless you're getting stale
No. You keep insisting on being a passive aggressive putzpah. Stop it!
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Girl you're the cutest poptart I've met recently in this box of deliciousness called life. Don't get stale on me and leave me hangin
Took out the passive aggressiveness while still trying to be aloof about it
You could be like, "Girl you're like.. that delicious box of Life cereal you take home that ends up being stale." LOL
No don't send that. Haha
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
LMAO
Girl you're an adorable strawberry poptart in this box of Life cereal and I'm a fresh glass of milk. Dont get stale on me
OR....
girl you're an adorable poptart in this delicious box of life and im the hot microwave oven. Dont get stale on me
Me: I know you like to play / I know we’re playing hide and seek, but I can hear you chewing from here babe 
or
Me: Did the baby kidnapped you and now is forcing you to watch Alvin and the Chipmunks on repeat? Don't worry my Batsuit is coming from the laundry... freaking Alfred
Just trying to help, much love, peace.
Damn it King these are way better than mine lol
Fuck i already sent my gay one
Me: Girl you're the cutest poptart I've met recently in this box of deliciousness called life. Don't get stale on me and leave me hangin
Nope nada
Who cares she sucks. But yeah you chased too much and your subtle craftery needs some work.
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Could you actually go into the "chasing" too much aspect of it? Like specifics.
I think i've been doing this unconsciously lately and funny because its not even from a place of "needing" the girl as if she's the only one.
Nope
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Her: haha just woke up from a nap
Me: hope you feel refreshed pop tart
Me: A nice crispy pop tart now not a soggy one
Her: thanks what flavor am I
Me: from what I've seen so far hmmmm just maple flavored
Me: nothing crazy like oreo or birthday cake just yet
Her: ewww I don't wanna be that
Me: pfff what flavor di you think you deserve kitty kat
Me: do you do any cool stuff or just cat naps all day
Her: I want to be confetti cake flavored, and well today I just napped
Me: Maybe you can be cupcake flavored one day baby cakes
Me: but thats gonna take some pure awesomeness
Me: or just buying me ice cream
Her: I am awesome :)
My adaptation. ..this chick kept on being lame too even after this little challenge scenario. I later hit her with
Me: slow down j.k rowling these texts are too dense for me to handle
and
Me: Geez you have lots to say
Me: whats your fav color
Me: do you like unicorns
Well those probbaly weren't the best examples she went gay on me again.
No sunny D for her.
Is this shoe store girl?
Nahh