Model looking Alexandra
Sun, 08/19/2012 - 23:34
Ok met this chick on the train station. Got her number. Texting back and forth, arranged a date once. It wasn't particularly good cause I was extremely knackered. However at the end of the date she texted me; " Hey good to see u tonight - thanks so much for walking me back.. just watching the end of olympic ceremony.." Could be an indicator of interest or just a polite girl idk. On thursday she invited me for a drink but I was with another girl so couldnt make it. She told me that she was gonna visit her cousin on friday , will be back on saturday so that we could meet up (On friday she texted me saying she is gonna visit her cousin on saturday, which I interpreted as invite me somewhere...) Then I spoke to her;
Her: What u upto I just came back from running, really tired. In fact my friends invite me xx club. I really want you to see this place but not really sure if I wanna go
Me: I am going to Richmond, great weather, awesome riverside can't think of a better atmosphere. Join me at 9pm
Her: Hmm I don't really know I am really tired
Me: Don't worry I will give u energy. In the worst case scenario, you can sleep on my shoulder
Her: I don't know I am too tired.
Me: Well whether you come or not, I am going there. Its all up to you. No pressure
Her: How can you party on your own?
Me: I don't need anyone to have fun.
Her: Wauww thats impressive. Anyway give me 20 min I will let you know.
Me: Ok
She called me in 10 min saying she is not coming (I bet she found a better party option) but she is free all sunday. We can do whatever I wanna do. I was like yeah cool... And today I called her she didn't respond. 4 hours later she called me;
Her: I am really sorry for getting you back that much late
Me: Well I have already realised that you are not the best one with phones..
Her: Yeah. I am really sorry a friend of mine is moving out, I am helping him now. What u up to around 8pm?
Me: Well I guess I am free around this time. As you are late I have already made a plan, going to my friend's place She will have a bbq at her garden but I guess I will be back at 8.30 9pm
Her: Look I am really sorry blah blah
Me: OK thats cool but keep in mind that I don't like that kind of cancellations. I can tolerate it this time, but if it happens again you will not be my priority anymore.
Her: Look I really need you, I don't wanna loose you blah blah but I don't want you to misunderstand I don't wanna have a date. You can be a great friend, I really enjoy spending time with you but I don't feel dating anyone at the moment.
Me: Hey look these kind of things should be spoken face to face but we barely know each other. I like you not only because you are cool, but also you seem to be an intelligent girl. I can actually talk with you. We don't need to put a name, you can be my best friend, or we can have a relationship, I can't say anything atm we barely know each other. Life is unpredictable, you never know whats gonna happen.
Her: Yeah ok
Me: So are you gonna be back at 8
Her: Well I don't know
Me: Ok if you say so this plan is cancelled. Next time sort your time management and call me accordingly
Her: But I didn't arrange anything with you, what I said was a suggestion for today. I can't say it is a plan!
Me: If you can't say it just don't say it ok?
Her: Puff ok
Me: Alright sort your thing out and I will speak to you soon. If it happens again, I will change my priorities...
Her: Ok bye "click"
I thought I spoke well but the way she shut the phone was kind of rude. She didn't even wait for me to say "bye". Maybe it was a shit test and I was kinda cool with that, didn't get angry and it made her angry. Or she might think I was aggressive.. I actually really wanted to date this girl but circumstances don't seem so. What do you think about it? Is she into me? Is it kind of a shit test or she is just NOT interested? How should I lead from here?
Her: What u upto I just came back from running, really tired. In fact my friends invite me xx club. I really want you to see this place but not really sure if I wanna go
Me: I am going to Richmond, great weather, awesome riverside can't think of a better atmosphere. Join me at 9pm
Her: Hmm I don't really know I am really tired
Me: Don't worry I will give u energy. In the worst case scenario, you can sleep on my shoulder
Her: I don't know I am too tired.
Me: Well whether you come or not, I am going there. Its all up to you. No pressure
Her: How can you party on your own?
Me: I don't need anyone to have fun.
Her: Wauww thats impressive. Anyway give me 20 min I will let you know.
Me: Ok
She called me in 10 min saying she is not coming (I bet she found a better party option) but she is free all sunday. We can do whatever I wanna do. I was like yeah cool... And today I called her she didn't respond. 4 hours later she called me;
Her: I am really sorry for getting you back that much late
Me: Well I have already realised that you are not the best one with phones..
Her: Yeah. I am really sorry a friend of mine is moving out, I am helping him now. What u up to around 8pm?
Me: Well I guess I am free around this time. As you are late I have already made a plan, going to my friend's place She will have a bbq at her garden but I guess I will be back at 8.30 9pm
Her: Look I am really sorry blah blah
Me: OK thats cool but keep in mind that I don't like that kind of cancellations. I can tolerate it this time, but if it happens again you will not be my priority anymore.
Her: Look I really need you, I don't wanna loose you blah blah but I don't want you to misunderstand I don't wanna have a date. You can be a great friend, I really enjoy spending time with you but I don't feel dating anyone at the moment.
Me: Hey look these kind of things should be spoken face to face but we barely know each other. I like you not only because you are cool, but also you seem to be an intelligent girl. I can actually talk with you. We don't need to put a name, you can be my best friend, or we can have a relationship, I can't say anything atm we barely know each other. Life is unpredictable, you never know whats gonna happen.
Her: Yeah ok
Me: So are you gonna be back at 8
Her: Well I don't know
Me: Ok if you say so this plan is cancelled. Next time sort your time management and call me accordingly
Her: But I didn't arrange anything with you, what I said was a suggestion for today. I can't say it is a plan!
Me: If you can't say it just don't say it ok?
Her: Puff ok
Me: Alright sort your thing out and I will speak to you soon. If it happens again, I will change my priorities...
Her: Ok bye "click"
I thought I spoke well but the way she shut the phone was kind of rude. She didn't even wait for me to say "bye". Maybe it was a shit test and I was kinda cool with that, didn't get angry and it made her angry. Or she might think I was aggressive.. I actually really wanted to date this girl but circumstances don't seem so. What do you think about it? Is she into me? Is it kind of a shit test or she is just NOT interested? How should I lead from here?
Mon, 08/20/2012 - 17:14
#1
Re: Model looking Alexandra
@hkmt: onto the next one. No need to explain your standards - just dont respond. Place her on the back burner but practice on her still. Also notice how you took the bait to hang out.
Mon, 08/20/2012 - 17:29
#2
Re: Model looking Alexandra
@Aequitas:
This is an example of what I recently have realized and briefly talked about.
Think of texting and getting a meetup, the same way you would think of any "sales" job.
What I see so many guys doing is trying to sell their product (the meetup) completely BLIND.
You wouldn't try and sell somebody a computer without asking them a TON of questions first (logistics).
Have you ever used a computer?
What do you like about the computer you're currently using
What don't you like about the computer you're currently using
How often do you use a computer?
Who are you currently buying computers from?
What do you like about the service they provide
What don't you like about the service they provide?
I mean, in a proper sales transaction- you could spend one or two conversations, simply going over these kinds of questions- gather as much information about what they like and dislike as you possibly can.
Then and ONLY then, would you even BEGIN to discuss the product you can offer them.
Without going through this process- you are stuck in a very odd situation.
Think about it- If your a salesman and you are selling BLINDLY (the way so many of us on here are operating in our text convos) it could look like this:
You: So I'm here to sell you a hamburger. It's amazing. Tastes delciious. It's from the best meat in the world. Kobe beef in fact. AND I'm going to sell it to you for 1 dollar.
Oh yeah- you're doing something that NOBODY ELSE CAN DO... You have the ULTIMATE product...
Her: I'm a vegetarian
You: Well.... fuck...
So you go into it blindly and you're selling a product without ever even making an ATTEMPT to understand the customer and what they actually need.
This translates to text game becuase you can't just go into inviting someone out without first getting them talking.
Step 1: Get them talking- be funny, be playful, ask open ended questions, describe YOUR day... all while getting logistics... figure out as much as you can about what she's doing
Step 2: CATER TO HER NEEDS... "Oh, well, I don't wanna make you trek round the city in heels girl, where do you live?"- understand the other person and figure out THEIR logistics so you don't go into the sale blind and then get hit blindsided by a monster truck... at least if you see it coming you can work around it and come at it all from a different angle without backtracking.
Logistics are INSANELY important- and it shows that you care... at least a little.
So in this example- you didn't do any of that. You basically ignored her shit and then went RIGHT into YOUR sale, without any concern for wtvr the fuck she's doing... despite the fact that she had even already given you a clue to what her logistics were for the night.
Then on TOP of that- your product fucking SUCKED dude. "Oh yeah, I'm going out alone"... wtf is that shti? .... i mean at least make an EFFORT to express yourself and how cool you are...
Don't take a fucking BMW and sell it like, "Yeah, I have a silver sedan that drvies okay"... the fuck?
This is an example of what I recently have realized and briefly talked about.
Think of texting and getting a meetup, the same way you would think of any "sales" job.
What I see so many guys doing is trying to sell their product (the meetup) completely BLIND.
You wouldn't try and sell somebody a computer without asking them a TON of questions first (logistics).
Have you ever used a computer?
What do you like about the computer you're currently using
What don't you like about the computer you're currently using
How often do you use a computer?
Who are you currently buying computers from?
What do you like about the service they provide
What don't you like about the service they provide?
I mean, in a proper sales transaction- you could spend one or two conversations, simply going over these kinds of questions- gather as much information about what they like and dislike as you possibly can.
Then and ONLY then, would you even BEGIN to discuss the product you can offer them.
Without going through this process- you are stuck in a very odd situation.
Think about it- If your a salesman and you are selling BLINDLY (the way so many of us on here are operating in our text convos) it could look like this:
You: So I'm here to sell you a hamburger. It's amazing. Tastes delciious. It's from the best meat in the world. Kobe beef in fact. AND I'm going to sell it to you for 1 dollar.
Oh yeah- you're doing something that NOBODY ELSE CAN DO... You have the ULTIMATE product...
Her: I'm a vegetarian
You: Well.... fuck...
So you go into it blindly and you're selling a product without ever even making an ATTEMPT to understand the customer and what they actually need.
This translates to text game becuase you can't just go into inviting someone out without first getting them talking.
Step 1: Get them talking- be funny, be playful, ask open ended questions, describe YOUR day... all while getting logistics... figure out as much as you can about what she's doing
Step 2: CATER TO HER NEEDS... "Oh, well, I don't wanna make you trek round the city in heels girl, where do you live?"- understand the other person and figure out THEIR logistics so you don't go into the sale blind and then get hit blindsided by a monster truck... at least if you see it coming you can work around it and come at it all from a different angle without backtracking.
Logistics are INSANELY important- and it shows that you care... at least a little.
So in this example- you didn't do any of that. You basically ignored her shit and then went RIGHT into YOUR sale, without any concern for wtvr the fuck she's doing... despite the fact that she had even already given you a clue to what her logistics were for the night.
Then on TOP of that- your product fucking SUCKED dude. "Oh yeah, I'm going out alone"... wtf is that shti? .... i mean at least make an EFFORT to express yourself and how cool you are...
Don't take a fucking BMW and sell it like, "Yeah, I have a silver sedan that drvies okay"... the fuck?
Mon, 08/20/2012 - 20:33
#3
Re: Model looking Alexandra
@buddhagames:
That's the issue, hkmt lacks basic empathy. Does not want to see these girls again, only has one use for them. These are not constructive interaction we're helping him build
That's the issue, hkmt lacks basic empathy. Does not want to see these girls again, only has one use for them. These are not constructive interaction we're helping him build
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Mon, 08/20/2012 - 22:43
#4
Re: Model looking Alexandra
@Manwhore:
No Manwhore you are wrong here. I actually really like her. Well educated, gorgeous girl. She is not for one night stand I would love to date her... In this convo I showed her a bit of tolerance but would like to set my boundries as well cause once u just say "Yeah thats cool" cancelling plans and flaking becomes a habit for girls. At least thats my experience...
No Manwhore you are wrong here. I actually really like her. Well educated, gorgeous girl. She is not for one night stand I would love to date her... In this convo I showed her a bit of tolerance but would like to set my boundries as well cause once u just say "Yeah thats cool" cancelling plans and flaking becomes a habit for girls. At least thats my experience...