First napkin (and #) close since coaching with MW - WOOT! + TXT CONVO
Ok, so was just chillin at a pub after work and started talking to a CUTE bartender who is apparently with an old acquaintance of mine. Chatting away and some other chick (we'll call her S) comes over starts talking to the bartender also. I stay put and engauge both. We all chat for bout a minute and i head outside. The new chick (S) apparently FLATS with the CUTE bartender.
So went outside and sat at a table. The new chick (S) is here with a group and as she comes outside she says i can join if i like. I do.
Her group consists of 2 dudes and 2 chicks who are all work mates of each other. S (is about a 5-6), her workmate A (probably a 6.5), and two other workmate dudes. Joined in, talked some shit, busted on the other chick (A) about some dude who is stalking her. Just chilling and being as present as I can in a new group (this is new territory for me).
As i got up, the first chick (S) started to write something down on a napkin in front of everyone. I pretty much suspected what it was gonna be, lol but im a number virgin so wasn't 100% sure. It becomes clear it is her number and one of the guys in the group says out loud "classy S". Everyone ignores and she gives me the napkin. I tell them i will see them again and we'll have some fun. Say goodbye to the cutie at the bar and leave.
Never thought my first # would be HER giving it to ME.
Grats to me... and thanks MW... you fuckin choice bastard. 
Me: What's up I'm cooking dinner. It's Hainswof.
Girl - 3 mins later: Otp with the flatties haha
Girl - 21 mins later: I'm not really an alcoholic. This is only the second night this week haha
Be like, "I'm totally judging you right now. I bet you're drinking zima"
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
WTF is Zima lol.
The next morning...
Me: I'm totally judging you right now. I bet you were drinking Cindy's Raspberry
Girl: Nah just beer haha
Is Zima even around anymore LOL? Hain, Zima's kinda like Mike's Hard except grimey... Like hobos drink it.
You did something that I do a lot. Cute bartenders are a fantastic way to get a night started and build pre-selection. At the worst, they HAVE to be nice to you. Say "You're my bartender tonight!" Tip her well and the investment will pay off a long way down the road. Most guys in the clubs or college bars, are there for whatever reason and don't even THINK to treat the girl (or guy) behind the bar as a human being. And trust me, bartenders deal with some real bullshit. If she knows you from a previous night, and knows you tip her well, you treat her well and you're not going to cause bullshit, she might tell the other bartenders there, "That's my customer, I'll take care of him." She will definitely return the favor.
Yeah, looked it up and was like WTF when i saw this...
Yeah, thanks for the tips Infinity yo.
Oh my god.
Don't you dare compare zima to Mike's Hard Lemonade
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
So what's your plan with this girl? Do you want to bang her or just make her a friend
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Hmm, a mouth fuck would be nice, though not that keen on raincoating and slipping into the wet pit. She is a little overweight for my liking and is only a 5-6 so...
May just 'friend' her and invite her and her crew out and about, or to one or two of my events and game the friends.
Ok so mouth fuck question. uhhh, is it 'normal' for guys to only want a blowjob from certian chicks, and not sex? Or am i coming from a fucked up mindset.
Lmao at Zima.
congrats Haines ketchup.
Shot G-Money. Ketch-u-up homie!
**Double-Post**
Convo to date.. Please critque peeps:
Me: What's up I'm cooking dinner. It's Hainswof.
Girl - 3 mins later: Otp with the flatties haha
Girl - 21 mins later: I'm not really an alcoholic. This is only the second night this week haha
Me - 10 hrs 53 mins later: I'm totally judging you right now. I bet you were drinking Cindy's Raspberry
Girl: Nah just beer haha
Me - 10 hrs 36 mins later: Beerzees huh? OK lemme guess uhh. Export 33. Cause I fuckin love that shit
Girl - 7 mins later: Haha yeah that's what I was drinking last night
Me - 16 hrs 25 mins later: Yo yo yo! So we planning on hitting town tonight, whats the plans for you and your crew chickie?
Girl: I'm heading to opunake for the weekend going camping.
Me - 16 mins later: Oh yea, you a camping chick huh. I haven't been camping for years, and when we did, we had a shitty old tent that leaked and stunk cause they never dried it properly before putting it away.. Was amazing...
Girl - 1 min later: Ew that's gross haha. Yeah love camping. And beaching and hunting and fishing etc. outdoors stuff in general
Me - 1 min later: Sweet, you going up there with ur Mafia crew, or is that shit just reserved for work hours.. Hah
Girl - 1 min later: Haha nah going up to see my family. Some gisborne ones and the taranaki ones. Haven't seen them in a couple months
Me - 47 mins later: Choice, guess u got one of those mean tents with sectioned off rooms n all.. Sleeping room.. Cooking room.. Massage room with some dude to rub hot oils in your body.. All that jazz
Girl - 2 mins later: Haha non idea what the tent is. Haven't been camping with this family before. Normally we are in a 13m motorhome. It's more like glamping haha. And no massage guy. Living the single life haha
Girl - 6 mins later: Shall I send brad along tonight haha
Me - 2 mins later: Pshh, go out in opunake town and pick up some random dude whis good with his hands... Massage problem solved lol. Yeah for sure, I wanna meet this creeper.. U got Alice's number yea? I feel like giving her a bit o shit today
Girl - 1 min later: XXXPHONE NUMBERXXX
Me - 2 mins later: What clothes is she wearing today? Color, everything..
Girl: Text her and ask haha
Me: Wtf, just tell me sam
Girl - 2 mins later: I'm not comfortable with this conversation.
Me - 2 mins later: Lol, gawd OK.. Imma pretend I'm stalker brad texting from a different number.. But need something to make her think I can actually SEE her. U feeling more comfortable now? Lol
Girl - 4 mins later: Haha ok that makes it much less creepy haha. blue jeans and a black wool and leather top haha
Me - 11 mins later: Alright, you can see you now? I'll send her one
Girl - 7 mins later: Yeah. You can see how that would seem creepy tho huh.
Me - 1 min later: Only if you don't know how to make it fun.. damn girl u think I would just leave her with the creepy vibe and that's that... Wtf.
Me - 22 mins later: So u up getting oil rubs for the whole weekend S?
AY! Yikes dude... lose the creeper prank thing! Creepy stalker is the last thing you want to be, even in pretending.
How can you make it a "You and Her" frame?
Like, "Seen any bears out there? Don't get turned into bear shit."
Then, "If we were getting chased by a bear, I'd totally trip you cuz I'm too sexy to die."
"You don't have to outrun the bear, you just have to outrun your friend..."
Use your imagination. You set yourself up for a few pretty good convos.
Were you trying to be sexy with that massage hot oils into your body line? Derp
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
@ Infinity:
Yeah that failed big time, creeper = no go... ever... lol.
I'll post the convo to the other chick in a bit. Creeper vibe is now officially gone from my game.
@MW:
Yeah i guess so. Was that off point?
Yes it was unbelievably terrible.
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Here is the fail creeper txts and what not to do lol... gawd:
Me: Hey A... ;-)
Girl - 14 mins later: Hi who is this?
Me - 5 mins later: I love those blue jeans you are wearing today.. *snap chat* OHH YEAH!! :-D
Me - 7 mins later: Plan B's got nothing on me. My stalker skills are superior to all!! Oh yeah, I like the woolly top thing you have also... Matches your awesome broken frame glasses.. Ohh yeah
Girl - 7 mins later: I'm sorry I've already got too much invested in my plan B Me - 5 mins later: Gawd damn I knew I was too late!!!
Me - 35 mins later: Naw seriously though, its Hainswof. What's up?
Girl - 1 min later: Sorry plan C I'm at work can't talk
Me - 2 mins later: Allll good... plan A
Legend/Key:
Plan B was what her friends called her actual weird creeper (his name starts with B)
Plan A was my WEAK attempt at humor as her name starts with A.
Plan C is what she called me as that is the start of my first name.
You told a girl you love the blue jeans she's wearing today? What the FUCK.
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
I think there are certain themes we got to touch on as far as not being material for "escalating" or flirting. Anything cliche or that could be considered "corny" is OFF LIMITS. Rubbing hot oils into a girl's body, telling her she looks good in "dem jeans". Anything that could be considered a "one-liner" has got to go
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Yeah I was trying to be funny taking the piss out of her actual weird creeper but realised this was fail.
I would never in my right mind txt a chick that crap otherwise lol.
Oh shit man that is a huge sigh of relief lol! Ok so as you can see the issue is if I thought you were serious they did too. Areas like that you REALLY have to be sensitive to perceptions. Got to make it super clear what's going on. In FACT one great way of managing that whole area is by pretending you're "one of them", or painting her in a scenario where she's dealing with one of those guys. It's still the same content, but YOU are out of the loop. Get it?
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
I make the same mistake all the time.