Ahh the break-up text (Side-chick trying to curve me, what are my options)
First time really dealing with casual relationships where I'm not monogamous with the girl, but she sticks around purely off the merit of my dick.
Brief history with the girl.
Had been seeing her for about 2 months.
Met up off tinder, got drinks and pulled her home. Pretty standard affair except either my game was incredibly tight or she was super down for me. Back to my crib and she gives me some LMR because my escalation went from very non-chalant and laid back to full on mauling her. Decided to do a freeze out and took her to the kitchen to make us some tea, 5 mins later back to my bed. Tiniest bit of anti-slut defense, she says "we're not having sex" as she's taking her bra off..lmao! Another 2 mins later and she's girating and whispering spanish in my ear.
I set up another date just to come chill at my house. She comes over, fuck her brains out...twice and we leave it at that. After this point she started hitting me up on her own and initiating dates.
Third date. Took her to the strip club the next date and she's visibly perturbed and chatting with me out of anxiety. I calm her and try to get her into a sexual mind frame which ends with her grinding on a stripper while eye-fucking me, then we go back to mine and I fuck her as she spits out the whole verbal porno of bringing me other girls.
I have to include this date was really awesome, we connected on a deeper level and after we had sex she became pretty vulnerable and asked if I'm "safe" and inquiring how seriously I take my sexual health. Then admitted that I'm the only guy she's fucking (this wasn't girl game either, she attempted to nest before but my demeanor made it quite clear that I'm not looking for something monogamous)
Fast forward two weeks and she comes over on the 2nd after new years, predictable stuff we fuck and she leaves. We had a good rhythm going but it started to get predictable especially because I wasn't giving her more emotions. She had tried to increase the intimacy on several occassions but I basically did not let the emotions pass a point of super fuckbuddies.
Hit her up this past weekend and at this point two flaked dates (1 her, 1 me) and a couple convos later we arrange a date for this saturday.
today I get this text
Her: Sir Niv while this has been fun I'm going to have to call this fling off for the time being...nothing personal
Granted I did not have the tightest game we last talked and I really wouldn't mind that much to let this one go. I AM curious as to what my options are other than leaving it alone.
She's cool and the sex is really good.
Me: por que pumpkin, Everything good with you?
what's your take gents
She's probably falling in love and you're not leading things in a direction you can actually make progress in. She's talking about other chicks, why aren't you doing that?
Her: Family matters sugarplum. I'll be fine
Yeah you're right, by the 3rd date I was setting the daddy-dynamic in place. However I lost all momentum when I went on vacation and felt like I had to regain footing and sexual compliance
called left a quick vm saying I was really looking forward to seeing her this weekend then a couple inside jokes
I was going to take things more intimate this weekend after I realized my mistake and understanding how much she actually likes me.
My fault is I didn't put any groundwork towards having intimate conversations or creating that intimate space prior.
I was going to try to retrieve that but it looks like she's trying to detach, so I'm going to re-engage with positive vibes and try to create that space retroactively
We'll see how this plays out and I'll keep this thread updated
Mmkay I'm curious if you actually read my response or not
Niv he's saying she doesn't want intimacy for whatever reason. Probably past heart break? She's falling in love with you dude that means you're NOT supposed to be going in that direction like you keep trying to do. She doesn't want that right now. He's saying she'd be totally down if you shifted towards being the dude she can have threesomes with. It's already set up you're just not taking it.