HB 9 Tinder Troll - Can Jihad Turn This Around? Find out Next Time on BLUE BALL Z
Matched with a HB9 on tinder and I think she's trolling me...I wouldn't be surprised if two girls got together and started messing around with guys on tinder. Hell, I've bonded with girls by screwing around with their matches.
This might be karma...
She initiates (red flag numero uno)
Her: I may be 5'10 now but when we're together i would only be half your heigh >:)
Me: Haha what?
Me: But ya you're right
Her: Dammit
Her: I'd be...you know...on my knees
Me: I know, I just wanted to see you say it ;)
Her: And how does it feel now that I said it
Me: Well "it" feels pretty hard rn. You're gonna have to take care of this
Her: Ugh do I have to
Me: Yup
(15min later)
Me: Ah i get it, you're all talk and a cute face. Its kewl, you probably couldn't handle it anyways
Her: You're right
Me: Shame, must be a pretty pic you on your knees
Me: Then again, w all your selfies, u probably dont eve have knees :P
Her: No i dont i just have nubs
Me: That killed my boner. Idk anymore...now im worried you have cobwebs in your vagina
Her: It's like a water fountain don't worry
Me: Idk, im getting cat fish vibes
Her: Catfish hav enice moist mouths
Me: So do fat old men w/o their dentures *cough *cough "Her Name"
Me: I'm too sexy to get taken advantage of
Her: I have nice big hairy man titties you can slide your pp thru ;)
Hmmm, disqualification game isn't helping too much here. Maybe if I switched it up on her and went to qualifcation game on her like:
Me: Lol, i actually like your sense of humor (etc. etc.)
^Y'know, try to get away form this back and forth infighting. But....she could be trolling...
Wut wut
But dude where's the value you're offering? She goes sexual and you just sit on it. You're not doing anything that "good" here tbh. Not even trying to turn her on
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Since she came in with a lot of interest, I was caught off guard. So I wanted to see it pan out and see how far she'd go...and then I thought she was trolling. Soo....
Ya imma go back now lol. ^_^
Game Set & Match MOTHER FUCKER
I re-engage after not responding to her last msg
Me: Lol
Me: I was actually just thinking about you..it was kinda hot..
If she wants daddys special, she gon get it
Her: I'm sorry
Me: Wow you're the queen of engaging txts babe lol
Me: Y r ya sorry
Her: Sorry that you were thinking about me
(That's weird. Self-esteem issues?)
Me: Maybe you'd change your mind if ya knew what i was thinkin :P
Her: What're ya thinking
Oh oh oh oh silly girl...you just let the beast out :)
Me: (long ass sext)
Her: There's an art to making pancakes and interrupting me may cause them to burn
Me: Ya but i wanna eat something else now
Her: There is peanut butter and bread in the cabinet
She puts up resistance but I SWAT DAT shit like a fly.
Me: Nope not listening
Me: And there's more..
Her: Yes tell me how you want me
Me: (sexysexysext)
Her: Press dat boner up against me daddy
Her: But can i feel your cock in me
Her: its like throwing a hot dog down a hallway
Me: Grab a fistful of your hair and shove my cock deep inside you. Letting you feel every inch of it as it goes in and out
Her: All of the 2 inches
Her: Let me grab your hair babe
Damn she's fiesty...and she's still throwing shit tests like a motherfucker geezus. This girl is a new beast.
Me: Only if u behave yourself
Me: Look what you're doing to me. I promised my mom id be good
Her: Why be good when you have all this badness stored up inside you?? Let it out on me ;))
Me: I can't take it
Me: What are u dong rn
Her: Watching tv
Me: Shoot me yer num (my number) you're getting cock later
Her: Perhaps
So the compliance move didn't pull through..BUT i didn't expect it too. There is 0 comfort in this convo but I went ahead and did it to display that this will eventually be a serious fuck session and not a tinder masturbating session. I did this because this girl gives me the flakey yet flirtatious vibes. She's the type to lead you on and then cut you dry and will cycle that a lot. So I had to make shit clear.
Then I start to shift the tone. This is where most guys lose it after sexting...they get WEIRD and THIRSTY and believe that just because they sexted a girl...they're due some compensation. I saw this recently in the facebook group where one individual said that they lose girls after sexting....its not the sexting. I think every one of my text convos on this forum has sexting in it....ya I sext damn near every girl. It is not the problem...its how you handle it afterwards.
Me: You need a spanking babe
Her: You're the one being bad ;)
Me: Ya maybe you could help me with that ;)
Me: That is..if u can even take 2 inches :P
Figured I'd give a shot at disqualifying but it does not seem to work at all on this girl.
Her: Of course not
Me: Y'know you're cute but so are a lot of girls, if u weren't interseting to me i might not be takling to you rn
Me: Do u even have any passions or interests
Sooooo...I go the behavior shaping route. Essentially, I call her out on the fact that nothing going on right now is real but I do like her and want to get to know her. So step up.
Her: Yknow you're good looking but so are a lot of guys, if you werent appealing to me i might not be talking to you rn
Damn it.
Me: Wow
Me: You're everything i thought i never wanted in a girl
Her: You thought
Her: But you know you want this so much
Me: Perhaps
Fight fire with fire. I'm throwing her game back at her.
Her: Anyway my passions include helping people enjoy their lives, working toward advancements in medicine, and getting to know people from all over with different backgrounds since learning to love and appreciate differences is important in leading a fulfilling life
Her: I'm sleepy :(
Her: Also i do like making pancakes
BA BAM.
Me: Wow finally a real response lol! I really like that. Thats actually super fucking cool
Her: Thanks my favorite kind to make is chocolate chip
Her: Other than being a sexy beast what do you like to do
Me: Ya you're seriously winning me over lol idk what would be hotter now, the pancakes or u making them ;)
Me: I actually spent this past year travelling the world doing just that, getting to know people from al over and figuring out where I want to take my life. It changed everything.
Her: I wish I could do that :(
Me: But hey just txt me tiger and get some shut eye if you're tired. We can chitty chat more about it laterzz
Her: Okie dokie ;)
BADABUMBUMBUM
I'm lovin it
I've interacted with her type of girl once before and still have a hard time understanding it. The texts are so erratic and hold so much "idgaf" behind it, its nuts. Yo, MW, is this like the chicken nugget girl?
Yes except this girl's an intellectual snob that one was a "physical" snob.
I go in and I'm crisp, clean and my vocals are fucking coming out like music. - Anonymous MW student
- Autismus Terminus Finis (Root Cause/Cure of Autism Epidemic)
- Called Off My Wedding & Other Turn Tail Signs Of The American Male
Fuck yeah!
God damn where is the female psychology on these brutes..geezus. Like I feel drained just talking to her..
Her: Good afternoon you sexy thing you
Me: Hey lovebug..more like good morning lol i just woke up :P
Me: Hows your day going babe
Her: Great I had lunch and was looking at apartments w my friend :)
Me: Cool at (her college) or here in town? I'm about to head to the gym in a bit and work on my booty
Her: Our town! And ooo yes make i tnice and round for me ;)
Me: Ooo u wanna spank me dont u, my dirty lil girl ;P
Me: ive got something nice and hard for u to play with too
Her: Of course i do bc you've been bad
Me: Man there was noone at the gym tday. I blame it on my awesomeness
Me: So you're w your parents now for break ya?
Me: Ya i've been naughty and this bad boy is gonna throw you on his bed and punish u for turning him to the darkside
Her: I am with my parents
Her: And boi you're the dark sided one
Me: I can't help it. You're so adorable u turn my lightsaber hot and red
Me: We'd b a killa star wars duo. You'd bring em w the force and i cut em :P
Me: We'll rule the galaxy and have all the d-licious icecream for our phat selves
Her: With your hot red lightsaber???
Her: I thought it was only for me :(
Me: Nah boobear that one's for killing people..i wouldn't kill u :)
Her: Being killed in that manner sounds exhilirating lets do it
Me: Kewl whats your sched look like this week? I just gotta get my starship up and runnin
Her: I'm locked in a tower but i'll let down my hair so you can come up here and fingerblast me
Ok
Me: Thats a great idea. I'll pull on that 100ft long hair and make you scream for more. More than just a blast ;)
Normally I'd disqualify or challenge a bit..but that hasn't been working so well so I just went along with it.
Her: Wrap it around my neck and choke me with my own hair :) <3
Me: Flip u around and gag u with my cock. Im gonna have you suck every last dorp outtame
Me: When r ya free bo
Her: Idk maybe saturday
Flake waiting to happen but I pushed through just to get the idea out there that I'm not setting up a bootycall (even though it will end up that way hueheheuehe)
Me: Lets grab icecream and rob every bank on the way
Her: No i waont u in my mouth as much as possible
Ok nvrmind.
Me: Oh dw you'll get a full helping of my icecream
Me: Maybe sat..? That doesnt work for me
Her: I'm busy every other day
Me: I meant, hmu w a time for sat. so i can check my sched lovebug
Her: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Her: Anyway send nudes
Da faq?
Me: Lovebug r u on fb?
Me: Lemme add ya
Me: Oh you have to ear those nudes
Her: I deleted it bc i didnt use it
Her: But i remade it for the tinder
I started getting weird vibes again...what girl doesn't have fb...A MAN thats who
Me: Do you have any other social media? I wanna see more than just yer purty face ;)
Her: Y ai have everything else
Me: Whats ya insta
Her: Send nudes n i'll tell u ;)
Me: I want your nudes first imma man its only fair
Me: Its not like im asking for your kidney poo
Me: That's only on tuesdays lol
Her: Today is international women's day sooo
Her: No its today!!
Me: This is getting kinda ridiculous lol you're treating me like a piece of meat
Then i started getting frustrated and called her out
Her: I know you have a nice piece of meat ;)
Me: Girl i think you're cool...but you're all over the place and its confusing as fuck whats up
Her: I'm sitting in my room and for some reason my neighbors decided to do karaoke outside
Her: So im pissed!
Me: Those bastards..imma lightsaber them..wru at my spaceship is ready for takeoff
Her: i'm at home w my dog
This girl replies to me back in less than a minute so I know she's not doing anything. I'm just testing the waters at this point cause I'm so lost with where to go.
Me: Oooo i luv dogs
Me: Do u have a pic
Her: (Pic)
Me: Awwww
Me: Do u wanna see my dog ;)
Her: Yes
Me: I'm warning u he's pretty big
Me: I think he likes u too
Her: Yay
I send a dick pic...lol
Me: (Dick pic)
Me: His name is godzilla
Her: Fuck you
U just asked for nudes you bish. Then i did quick damage control
Me: Lol im just playing babe
Me: My real dog died not too long ago :/
Me: And thats from the internet lol i wouldnt actually send u a dickpic..
Her: Im sry bae
Her: Are you sure its not yours
Me: Ya mines bigger and less hairy lol
Her: Ew gross i like shorter hairier ones
Me: The color is sorta clsoe but i had to fool y hehe
Me: And u did ask for nudes u prevy lil girl
Me: But damn i do want to see u rn...wonder what kinda goodies you're hiding
Her: Yours gets mine :)
....the hell..
Me: So now u want a real dickpic..
Me: Lol thats what i meant by confusing
Me: First the instagram and now this..
Me: I get the sense you're the type to lead guys on
Her: Am i
Her: (Booty pic)
Me: Mhmm thats a nice bum bum
Me: Is that urs lol
Her: No its all yours
Me: R your parents home girl
Me: Your other daddy wants to see u
Just testing the waters...didn't expect anything but this girl is so unpredictable
Her: Im busy
Me: Oh i actually have shit to do nvrmind
Me: Nice booty but is it functional
Her: I dont poop so no
Me: Ah i prefer ones that I can use as a drink coaster
Her: mine makes a nice supportive pillow
Me: Yknow you're funny girl i like that
Me: You'd make the perfect witty sidekick
Me: We just have to work on the sassiness :)
Might as well try to qualify...she responded well before.
Her: Nooo my sassiness is crucial
Me: Haha its cute but it'd be ncie to talk to u instead of miss sassy
Me: Whatcha up too lovebug
Me: chillin at the bookstore on this supa nice dace gettin my nerd on
Her: I want food!!
Me: Go get some u lazy butt
Her: Im on a mission
Me: To find a fat kitten
Me: Im sitting next to this group of grandpas and i think they're...
Her: Jealous of your sex appeal
Me: That is very true
Me: But no
Her: Are they dead
Me: Maybe in a few min this one's coughing like a mofo
Me: But also no
Her: What r they doing!
Me: I can only tell you saturday
Me: Top secret
Me: U wanna go on an adventure
Her: What kind of adventure
I left it off here and I'm trying to regain mental stamina lol....Disqualifying, and teasing don't really work lol but when I drop truth bombs and disapproval that seems to work well. It's just super hard to walk a fine line of controlling asshole and dude who wants to shape yo shit ass behavior.
Qualifying works a teeny bit after she opens up but thats rare. Geezus christ...what..? lol
The beginning was much better and she was really receptive. The end its just erratic.
Holy ballsack that hurt my brain to read! I dunno bro. I've dealt with one chick like this before, it was super super tough to get her number off of tinder but I still haven't set up a date cuz' she's just so erratic.
The only method that appeared to stead things in my favor was I stopped playing the intellectual battle and I went more lovey dovey (without sexting) and when she played with me I acted somewhat disappointed.
It went something like this
her: Yes I'm a sexy librarian blah blah blah but you're a four eyed mongrel
Me: pfff you really know how to make me feel special
Me: and I thought we were gonna rob a Starbucks together ...
she eventually realized i was I was being sincere and asked for my snapper and then I got her #. I think the same dynamic could be used to blitz to the date. These girls feel like people are fuckin with them 24/7 so I think just be more straight up and real might work. She might even think your fire sexts are a joke cuz' she's never experienced a real man.
Alright, alright, alright. I just studied this some more. I think the sexting is a trigger for her to start acting up. It's not a a dude, there is wayyyyy too much investment. Just a guess, girls like this have a hatred for men that try and talk their way into sex. She prides herself in her verbal prowess. You need to be a wolf in sheeps clothing and simmer down a bit.
Hm ya I could try getting away from this duel of the minds noice.
Ya im txting her now and its off tinder. Left it off at that last text.
Thats a really interesting thought. Elaborate on the wolf in sheeps clothing pweese.
You mean drop verbally talking about sex and go for a more "lets do this xyz" and ofcourse SURPRISE bitch now we gon fuck when i get her out?
Few points i rlly like what you said:
1) She prides herself on her verbal prowess
2) girls like this think people are fucking w them 24/7
3) Sexting triggers her cause she doesn't take it srsly
4) Blitz the date with actual disappointment (w/o serious wittiness or she'll act up)
Cool. Need to setup a date first lol. Bish wont agree lol.
By wolf in sheeps clothing I mean chode yourself out a bit. Make her feel like her intellect effectively knocked you off your player pedestal and now you're ready to be sincere and want to get to know her.
When she acts up come from a frame that you're dissapointed cuz' you were seriously starting to enjoy her. Make her feel like the combative one.
I'd cut the sexting and go to sincere and silly like you did early in the convo.
Me: let's people watch at Starbucks and harass employees together until they give us free drinks :p
Me: You're interesting to talk to babe so we could have a good time anywhere really
just an idea...
Me: let's people watch at Starbucks and harass employees together until they give us free drinks :p
Me: You're interesting to talk to babe so we could have a good time anywhere really
just an idea...
Me: We should people watch in Starbucks and harass the employees for free drinks :p
Me: Our texts are so funny can't even imagine the chaos we would cause in person lol
Me: some pool, evade the police, and icecream
Her: Or we could just lie in a meadow and you can tell me how pretty I am
Me: Is that your idea of getting to know somebody That doesnt sound like fun at all
Her: Yes boo it's all about my validation
Me: pff you really know how to make me feel special..
Me: I even had a few skimasks ready to rob the icecream shop..
Her: You can rob me of my purity
....
No comment.
__________
Got lazy with the date suggestion in the first one but that's not even a big deal. She was gonna respond like that anyway. But to make up for it, I added some pazazz to the "skimask" part. Her "purity" nonsense is just a way to get me back into getting all sexy with her. Like its all a big joke. I know I can turn this around..thats the only reason I got her number. Or else, that was a pipe dream too.
Ex:
"Seriously? If this is who you are over txt then I'm not interested in meeting the real life equivalent"
^Might be too much. Maybe we can make it less ultimatum-esque and simmer it down
Jihad I guess you have to realize that you did send her a dick pic lol. The battle of the sexts is going to be tough to shake.
hmmmm maybe start sending her awesome pics of you doing stuff to normalize everything...Can you start appealing to something real in her life?
Hmm if it were me, I wouldn't be putting so much investment and mental energy on this one tinder girl - she must be DAMN hot!
At this point, I would just cut all the bullshit and be super real with her about what you want and if she's not down just leave it at that.
You take it sexual - she overdoes the sexual texting in a way that is not that sexy
You take it normal - she brings up sex again and again it doesn't sound genuine - more tongue in cheek.
IF she doesn't go for the meet up on sat or sounds really flaky again:
I'd go with sth along the lines of: 'alright babylove I think you're fun to talk to, but I'm not really interested in being penpals on an app for a chat-room wedding somewhere down the line. lol. If you're gonna be real then cool we can meet and if not thats fine too.' (maybe add 'kthxbai' at the end)
Jihad I guess you have to realize that you did send her a dick pic lol. The battle of the sexts is going to be tough to shake.hmmmm maybe start sending her awesome pics of you doing stuff to normalize everything...Can you start appealing to something real in her life?
That's a good idea. She definitely has seen my instagram cause its linked to my tinder but the bish won't give out hers....I honestly have no way of getting snap either cause she plays wayy too many games.
Kierk, i think i'll bust that txt out to see if I can get any sort of realness out of her...then use that window of opportunitiy to get insta/snap so then I can cement that I am a real person and not a computer generated text machine of awesomeness.
Ya I just want to learn yknow...learning about all these diff. kind of girls is super intersting
Ah fiddlesticks. No resp
Sent this
Me: Aight lovebug i think you're fun to talk to, but im not rlly interested in being txt penpals lol. If you're gonna be real then cool we can meet and if not thats fine too. Kthxbai
It probably wouldn't have mattered in the end, but I would have left out 'kthxbai' because it looks like you're expecting a rejection and you're pre-emptively protecting yourself from it.
Ahh i feels ya.
Ah fiddlesticks. No respSent this
Me: Aight lovebug i think you're fun to talk to, but im not rlly interested in being txt penpals lol. If you're gonna be real then cool we can meet and if not thats fine too. Kthxbai
You sent that cold?
Would have made more sense for that a message or two your next high note like when she said:
Her: Anyway my passions include helping people enjoy their lives, working toward advancements in medicine, and getting to know people from all over with different backgrounds since learning to love and appreciate differences is important in leading a fulfilling life
In other words, when she is investing then something that requires compliance. (sort of like how you move her right after you get her to laugh)
So far you have her running around like an ADHD kid and you trying to catch her. Sometimes she's running towards you (being sexual), sometimes she's running away (teasing you, being dismissive), all the while you're chasing her trying to get her to calm down and come along. Now you just yelled at her to follow you, probably not good. It makes sense if you can take her or leave her and have other options lined up or simply don't want to invest this much in this particular girl.
I'd rather you have another conversation of the type you had before and then after drawing out some investment say something like he suggested, like about how you lose attraction for a girl if you feel like she's not that interested in meeting up, that a lot of girls just want to have texting buddies but that that's not a real connection and you get bored with it. (and avoid the kthxbai which is dismissive, you're likely going to pay for that in your next interaction with her, if there is one).
What I think Kierkedashia did was litterally tell you "what he would do" because in this case he'd be frustraited with this one girl and maybe has other girls from Tinder or cold approach or whatever and wouldn't tollerate this behavior. So essentially he'd send that and not give a shit if she responded or not (while it seems like you do).
He said:
"Hmm if it were me, I wouldn't be putting so much investment and mental energy on this one tinder girl - she must be DAMN hot!
At this point, I would just cut all the bullshit and be super real with her about what you want and if she's not down just leave it at that."
And you took his ultimatum as a tool to get her to respond:
"Kierk, i think i'll bust that txt out to see if I can get any sort of realness out of her...then use that window of opportunitiy to get insta/snap so then I can cement that I am a real person and not a computer generated text machine of awesomeness."